In Which Zombie Joe Becomes a Meme

So I know I have touched on this before, but sleep disorders seem to be a thing with me. Like as in narcolepsy is one of the few of them I don’t seem to get from time to time. I was a sleepwalker as a kid. As an adult, when really run down with a fever, I will go on full discussions and actions without any memory of it. Though, to be fair, those discussions are like talking to a character in a David Lynch movie. On acid. The brown stuff. And meth.

willy-wonka-willy-wonka-hes-the-greatest-chocolateer_c_995800I bring this up as my insomnia has hit again. Which is a bit missing the point. It is always there. I rarely sleep more than six or seven hours on a good day. When I say it “hit” that means it “dialed its ass up to 11 and broke the knob off.” Seriously, I know I am really hitting the fatigue hard when I turn into a Willy Wonka meme. You know the one. Not the Johnny Depp Wonka either. The earnestly creepy one. The one that turns Gene Wilder into a dick. The one that makes me want to say, “You never get any sleep? Please, tell me again how you played Farmville past midnight and still went to work.”

Or more to the point…

You never sleep enough? Talk to me when you count the days until you suffer involuntary hallucinations.

Which lead me to…

You know how you can tell you are really starting to trip over the edge? You come up with terms like “involuntary hallucinations” and think its a thing. Like there are voluntary ones out there.

Last night I was so tired that while making risotto for dinner I cut myself across the knuckle of my index finger. I wasn’t slicing anything. I was just so tired I unknowingly neanderthal knuckle dragged my hand across the counter grabbing my measuring cup I was using to spoon broth into the pan. Luckily I was done chopping the shallots and garlic. On the down side, I had finished cutting the shallots and garlic. I made the wound and salted it in one fell swoop. It was pretty awesome.

Between work, the Midian anthology submission and the con planning, this is totally not what I need right now. At the same time, I am managing with only one day where the migraine kicked me in the sack and demanded I slow down. I am still able to be productive and type at way to fast of a speed at work. So, I think it is going pretty well. But then again, I did manage to sleep almost five hours in one stint last night. It may be the sleep high talking.


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