A Short Mental Vacation

This morning I needed to get into the office a little early. More to the point, I needed to let my words percolate a bit anyhow, so I was skipping the coffee shop for pre-work writing. And yes, I am regretting the no coffee before work – thanks for reminding me.

In light of this, I am giving a short update that doesn’t involve word counts, talk of caffeine or even my current sanity level. Actually everything I write here is a testament to my current sanity level. But the first two – totally not about this post here. In fact three things brought about this post.

The Cause

Thing 1

J.A. Saare posted a vlog thanking fans and readers for reading her books and following her on the web. In total seriousness I think we don’t thank people in our lives nearly enough – especially the ones we don’t have direct face time with.

Thing 2 (with a nod to Dr. Suess of course)

Today J.A. Saare also stated in Twitter that people would not want to run into her at a con because she “ain’t right in the head.” This of course led me to state that she is an author. A fiction author. Consider this those of you who attend cons and writer’s conferences. How many fiction authors have you run into that were “right in the head.” Consider that, I will get back to this.

Thing 3 (Sorry Cat in the Hat, there are 3 things here)

An author that I read and enjoy their books started following me on Twitter. This same author at one point gave me some encouragement. Or at the very least they made me think I wasn’t going to be completely over my head at a writer’s conference.

The Effects

Effect 1

When someone I read and admire follows me on social networking, gives me a word of encouragement as us aspiring authors need now and again or simply goes “Anyone known as Zombie Joe needs something special on this book!” it makes me feel like a kid being picked first at kick ball. At least I would assume that’s what it feels like – by the time I was really good and kicking we weren’t playing that in gym class and honestly I was training at kicking an entirely different set of balls.

Snark humor aside, if you are one of these authors – no matter if you are a midlist author or a rock star of the scifi genre like Neil Gaiman – I appreciate each and every one of you. My own ideas of how one acts while standing in line at a convention to get a signature leave me with a stunning inability to say that in person (too much time working cons as the “hired help,” a.k.a. indentured servant), but I do appreciate you.

Effect 2

A series of “You Know You’re a Fiction Author When…” jokes started popping up. Well, started popping up between bouts of #jayerumors today. If you are reading my blog there is a better than even chance you are an author or an aspiring author like me. You will likely get these jokes. Otherwise, you are at least a reader and will probably get them as well – or at least get a chuckle out of them.

If you have some of your own, feel free to leave them in comments. We should all share in our “pain” and latent (or not so latent) insanity.

You Might Be An Author When…

  • If you stay up late at night because the voices of the characters in your head won’t let you sleep… you might be an author.
  • If you ever asked where the liver was on the human body and had someone answer in less than 20 seconds including the depth needed to puncture to hit it and approximate time it would take an average human to bleed out from a cut there… you might be an author.
  • If you have ever caused your spouse to rethink buying that dutch oven for your camping supplies because of something your character did… you might be an author.
  • If you ever watched the latest YouTube viral video and thought, “I am totally using that in my next story” instead of “Wow is this really dumb yet profoundly entertaining” … you might be an author.
  • If you can make someone reading the ingredients label off of a box of cereal sound dirty… you are likely an author.
  • If you watch television and are figuring out the 4 different ways to make yourself think the wrong person is the killer and still manage to catch the twist at least 10 minutes before the reveal… you are an annoying author if you tell your spouse. (Trust me on this one.)

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